Monday, April 23, 2012

Les Lambert et moi

It has been a week since Thomas dad and little brother Lucas left. They spent a week here with us and it has been really nice. Though from the beginning their arrival wasn't anticipated from us as a regular family visit. The reason is probably that Thomas and his dad have a complicated past (that I have no right to tell here), but what I can tell for sure is that the week we spent together had a meaningful importance to me...and I'm sure for them too.
Une Semaine avec 3 Lambert

Etienne - Thomas father - has always been extremely nice to me since I first met him 6 years ago. However, I never felt to truly know him. I'm so glad we had the opportunity to spend some time with him and Lucas.
It's amazing how things unfolded smoothly. Prior to their arrival, I wasn't sure about how the week could have evolved, I was worried to share my daily routine and home life with someone I barely know. No worries at all: the atmosphere was chilled and relaxed... more natural than I could expect!

I give an important meaning to their visit. Maybe nothing that Etienne premeditated, but I felt there was a purpose in his visit. Probably a purpose to tighten the bond with his grown-up son and get a bit closer. I always had a good vibe about Thomas' dad, but in this occasion I discovered sides of his personality that I didn't know. He is a wise man and has a lot of interesting things to say and teach. He's sensitive and didn't hesitate to share his past experiences or explain unclear events of the family past. At the same time he was able to admit mistakes and face his failures. It is obviously easier for me to be understanding and sympathetic towards someone who isn't actually my father, but I was happy to understand there was much more to put into consideration.

And I'm glad I have things to remember about Thomas' father: I now know that Etienne doesn't drink coffee in the morning, but just tea with a "nouage" of milk. I know that he likes reading sitting outside with his book and thoughts only. He's interested in what people have to say and will listen carefully leaving them the time to formulate their sentences without need to rush. He knows how to remember the beautiful things of his past and how to give credit to those who made his life full of meaning.

I always thought Karin (Thomas' mom) was the one who mainly shaped the personality of his sons. This is certainly true and I definitely see her as a mom with super powers for doing such a great job on her own (although I might have a little critics on Thomas reluctance for houseworks!!!LOL!).
What I certainly do know now is how genes play an important role. No matter who raised him, Thomas is very similar to Etienne in many little things. It was funny to talk to him, look into his eyes, facial expression and see Thomas in him. Maybe this is why I feel tenderness towards Etienne and I hope this nice week can be the beginning of a new more consistent relationship between father and son. :)


Camilla said...

Che spunto meraviglioso. Quanto c'è da scoprire degli altri... si capiscono tante cose dei nostri amici e compagni conoscendo i loro genitori...chissà cosa si capisce di noi conoscendo i nostri genitori?!

Gaijin Bebe' said...

Hai proprio ragione Cami... per quanto si possano passare momenti di conflitto e incomprensione in cui diciamo "non saro' mai come Lei/Lui!!!", i nostri genitori ci plasmano e alcune volte, senza volerlo, ci ritroviamo a dire o fare cose dove suoniamo esattamente come loro! :)

Diny Naus said...

Hi Bebe - wow such a wonderful and thoughtful post - it was lovely to read. You are a very special lady and I am glad I had a time to get to know you. Big hug.

Gaijin Bebe' said...

Thanx Diny!!! It was fun to be your neighbor for a while and I still remember with a smile that night you couldn't find your key and you crashed on our futon or the time you had to open your apartment door to my lost sister !!!! Hope you're doing fine in HK. Big hug :)